Thursday, 29 April 2010

The Bigotted Blogger

Well after yesterdays masterclass from Herr Brown on how to "win" voters over-especially when they are lifelong NuLiebour supporters-the gloves are off folks!
Here in the somewhat overcast Midlands I dread to think what he would have called my mate 'Pete' for what he would have said. In fact I can't see, no matter how polite he may have been, how he would have made the news with his views! Perhaps Gordon (the 'grinning jackernapes' doppelganger extraordinaire with the plastic smile now firmly pasted on the countenance, no matter what the circumstance!) would have been honest, for once, and simply told him to f**k off as in his world these things didn't happen!
Immigration is a sore point with many British born & breds for it is the european immigrants that are bringing this country to its financial knees (in part) due to the great disparity between monetary power in respective countries.
5 years ago my friend, a kitchen/bathroom fitter, could earn a decent wage without ripping people off in the process. He was happy with his lot, not too happy that he sometimes had a 3 week break between jobs but generally happy. Nor was he an exhorbitant pricer of jobs for the trade had already determined that it was £'x' per cupboard fitment, or £'x' per electrical socket moved/removed/created - whatever.
Well, work started drying up and he seemed to spend more time at home than not, more time in the pub than not (until July 1st that is!) and was generally now pissed off with 'his lot'
The household budget was cut month by month and paying for the normal things we come to expect was getting to be a real struggle as the months went by. Even the modest family holiday got the sack as finances did not allow such an illustrious pleasantry. He was worried, he was concerned for with a good few years of 'working life' left my friend was not a happy bunny at the prospect of more years of struggling to even get a job.
One fine day salvation came from the telephone. Mr Asraf phoned him-18 months after my friend (Pete)had been round to quote for his kitchen fitting in a reasonably large extension. "I am smelling gas all the time Mr Pete, please come to my house and help me?" Not unaturally 'Pete' was pissed off but intrigued at the same time thus agreed to go and see what Mr Asraf was moaning about.
To simplify matters here, the new gas cooker was situated on the opposite side to where it originally was due to the new extension, thus the proverbial 'mile away' from the inlet connwction.
It didn't take Pete long to ascertain the nature of the "I'm smelling gas Mr Pete" for, after removing 3 of the kitchen plinths he spotted the glorious sight of 23ft of green hosepipe connected, either end, by 'jubilee clips'. That was the gas supply to Mr Asraf's newwly refurbished kitchen! Class job folks. Class Job!
Pete dutifully told Mr Asraf what the problem was and pointed out that it was only a matter of time before the pipe perished and Boom-Boom, "new kitchen in sky-and probably half the extension as well!"
"Mr Pete, you are very good man, you fix for me-please?" Pleaded Mr Asraf.
"I certainly can Mr Asraf, but you are looking at about £'x' to do it properly in copper pipe and affixed to the walls correctly as 4 of your base units have to come out to get the bloody pipes in!"
The hands went up in horror at this idea, "oh no, non, no" he cried, "I pay these mens £500 to fit my kitchen, I not paying anymore-you do for me, please?"
After a bit more conversation Pete found out that 2 Kossovans had been touring the area, picking up jobs willy-nilly and charging £30 per day-no matter what the job was! To top it all Pete knew them and had actually used them as labourers (when they first got here) for a small extension build. As Pete had said at the time, "by God, they can dig!"
But now, after nearly 2 years of living here it seemed that their 'talents' had evolved somewhat and there was no end to their repertoire! They were both living in a small, cheapish hotel at the taxpayers expense, getting dole money and sending money home to their village in Kossova every single week-unbelievable. Pete decided to catch up with them for he knew that every saturday night they would enjoy a drink in the Polish Club near the hotel.
He told Mr Asraf that it was his own fault the gas pipes were of such a standard and that if he didn't want to pay proper money to have the proper job done it was up to him. Plinths replaced, tools in box-gone!
Forward to saturday night:-
"Hi Bissan, how's it going mate?"
"Ah, Mr Pete, you have job for me? yes?," replied the Kosso' as Pete smiled at them and accepted the frothing pint. During the next hour Pete found out that as his workload had decreased, theirs had, naturally, increased. Well, at £30 per day labour charge it would! Pete also found out that they were leaving "your very good and kind country" as they had now accrued enough money "to buy my village!"Between them, accepting all the benefits this country affords such people, they had managed to send almost £25,000 back to their homeland, live here for nothing for almost 2 years and live in state aided funded hotel to boot!
Pete had seen his mortgage rise & fall like a yoyo, struggle for work, forget about holidays and had almost contemplated 'signing on', so desperate were things becoming.
Who was the idiot here?
So Mr Brown, when your 66 year old pensioner cornered you like a rat on the immigration problem, why was she such a bigot? Why did you not heed the voice of the people-God knows you need to. You thought you had got the perfect model to make your disastrous walkabout/talkabout a massive PR success-except for the fact that you are so out of touch with reality you didn't even think your team needed to prompt the 'subject' with the correct answers to your questions! To top it all, you even managed to completely upset a lifelong NuLiebour stalwart! You are a walking disaster man, you are a thorn in your own side. You have killed your own election chances for good-and all because a little old lady brushed on the subject of immigration-whereas Pete would have torn you to shreds on the subject !
The problem here is that, are the other two 'head in the clouds' leaders of your ilk-or do they actually listen to the voice of the people? I somehow doubt it so just where will this country end up.
As for Mr Asraf, there was a flurry of action re fire engines and ambulances a few weeks ago in his part of town. Pete doesn't know for certain but when the local paper reported the event he had a wry , almost satisfied smile on his face.
The power of immigration people! Immigration!

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